Classy reunions...

Like the rest of the world, I am on Facebook. (Or is it "have a Facebook", as the kids at work say?) I was resistant to join, but join I did over a year ago. I have to say, it's been mostly a fun ride connecting with people I never thought I'd hear from again. Some have surprised me with the paths their lives have taken, some surprise me because I accurately predicted where they would be, and some just surprise me when they send me a 'friend request' or accept one of mine. It feels good to be remembered, and to know that we started a conversation years ago that they find worth continuing.

There are times when I just want to log off for good. It's hard for a cynical person such as myself to handle all those life-is-good postings. As my husband so eloquently put it, I need to "work on being happy for other people". He's right about that. There are times when my first reaction to someone's warm and fuzzy status update is 'oh, just shut up already'. But those times are getting few and far between, and I'm shedding that protective cynical shell. I truly am happy to see so many of us out there getting to places we want to be. I'm not naive; I realize that people sugarcoat and embellish, put up facades of peace, love, and happiness for an image they hope will make everyone the teensiest bit jealous. But I have hope that if they are little white lies, they will serve as self-fulfilling prophecies, and folks will start to actually exist as they do in their virtual lives.

I have connected with old friends from high school, which, for someone who doesn't attend class reunions, is an unexpected treat. Those friends helped shape who I am today, and I am grateful. I am a nostalgic girl; I will zoom back to that eighties decade at the drop of a Hall and Oates song, and stay there over-romanticizing until someone pulls me back to real time. But I have no real desire to go back there, or be that girl again. I did not always enjoy those 'best years of my life', as we were told they were, and don't need a do-over. For every happy flashback, there are two miserable ones right behind it. But I understand that a lot of us on the social network would take those days back in a heartbeat. While I'm glad they have more good memories than bad, I'm sad for those that cling to who they were then, as if that's the peak in their life's arc. I'm not trying to get any moments back. I don't want these renewed friendships to be exactly as they were when we were six or sixteen, or to take me somewhere other than here. We've been apart for big gaps of time, and we have all endured a lot of growing pains in those years of separation. I won't pretend to still know exactly who these people are, even though they are so familiar. I am so fortunate that those that were close to the 'me' then want to be close to the 'me' now. They are still my cheerleaders, still supportive and encouraging. Most importantly, they haven't called attention to what's different about me. They've let me be who I've grown to be...and I do hope they will call me out if I ever try to spike my hair again.